What is the purity of a woman?
At all times, women’s purity was valued. But in the current consumer society, women are so used to lying that only a few representatives of the sex have knowledge of female purity.
To begin with, the entire female beauty industry is built on lies. A woman wears perfume and smells like someone else, and she’s lying about that. She puts on makeup and lies again, showing “not her” face. Highlights the bust with a push-up, again cheating. This lie takes away a woman’s purity. But that’s not all.
We are not pure when:
We demand standards of female behavior from ourselves. After attending trainings on how to become feminine, women begin to strive for standards of female behavior. Then they also demand standards of male behavior from men. But such “standardized” men and women will play relationships like pasochki in the sandbox. The truth is that before you become a woman or a man, it is important to become a man.
We flirt . Through flirting, women hide their vulnerability. They shoot eyes, fawn, send signals. And in this there is vulgarity and selling yourself. There is no risk of rejection in flirting. This means that it is safe: if you do not catch the signal, it is your own fault. On the contrary, to be open, such as it is, is risky, can be rejected. Psychologically, rejection can be equated with murder. The one who is rejected is not considered alive, worthy of attention. Surely many of us have at least once died in a relationship, when in response to our purity and nakedness were rejected.
We sell ourselves as a function. In our purity, we are alive and vulnerable, like children or animals. But often in relationships, we show only our strengths: professional qualities, the qualities of a wife and a hostess. If you remove the “living” side from the relationship, they turn into contracts and agreements. This is shown, for example, in the way people approach marriage. Often a man chooses a wife based on a set of qualities. Having met a suitable one in terms of parameters, he begins to care for a well-known scenario. After the wedding, as a rule, courtship stops. He had already “bought” his wife, and it was time to use her as a household appliance. Ironically, even the wedding dress is traditionally white, like a washing machine or refrigerator.
We try to insure ourselves in a relationship. If you give yourself to a man, there is a risk that he will use you only for sex. At the same time, to try to insure yourself against such a disappointment is to be cunning. Trying to insure themselves, the partner demands loyalty from the other in the relationship. But this demand is violent, it means: give me your soul, all your choices, your living life, so that I can be at peace with you. But this usually ends in hatred and accusations: “You are no longer alive. Where is the passion?” In fact, safe toys are made only for children, in a living relationship, to insure yourself is to put your soul in a condom.
We treat our partner as consumers. In the purity of relationships, the most important message is ” Thank you for being there.” And often the relationship begins without expectations and conditions, as between two deities. But then this purity is lost somewhere and claims begin: “Why didn’t you shave?”, “Why aren’t the flowers the right ones?”, “I put on an uncomfortable dress for you, sacrifice something too”. Instead of allowing the other to be what he wants to be, to respect his line of destiny, conditions are imposed on him. The reverse story is the attitude to the meeting as a gift. A woman who is in love does not choose, as a consumer, between her fans. She chooses on the principle of “either he or I will die”.
We get upset . In the whole person, the head, the feeling, and the act are one. Hence the verb “upset”, when the integrity is lost. When a person thinks one thing, says another, and does a third. For example, he goes to the sea to relax, but at the same time thinks about work. Or when a woman has sex without actually wanting it. The body reacts to the lack of integrity with diseases, because there is an inner lie and impurity.
We are afraid of being vulnerable . The loss of purity begins when there is a fear of appearing vulnerable. But since this fear can not be shown, the person begins to cheat, to pretend not to be who he really is. As a result, a person begins to lie to himself.
What is purity? And this is allowing yourself to live out of your inner truth. At the same time, there is an understanding that the world can react to this truth in any way, can condemn it, reject it. In purity, the soul is exposed, when there is no stone in the bosom and hidden thoughts, when at the level of relationships, a person is not afraid to be naked.
What does it take to get clean? Doctors know that for the treatment of many chronic diseases, it is necessary to transfer them to the acute phase. For a person, such an aggravation often becomes catharsis. When so many emotions (fear, resentment) are accumulated that some situation becomes the last straw. Then the pain comes out, the person accepts it, cleanses through the pain and relaxes. Meditation and relaxation techniques will not bring about change. This can be achieved if you consciously go to overcome some difficulties. For example, go to the mountains with a backpack and feel the weight of this journey.